*BurntIre*
It was another quiet night in front of the computer. I was sitting there, typing happily, when a movement out in the darkness caught my eye. I stood and leaned over the computer to get a better look out the window. Nothing. How curious. Well, maybe it was just the dog. So I sat back down and smiled as I continued reading everyone’s posts on SetApartLife.
A sound–like someone tripped over something. A hushed voice. Then silence. Now, my dog may be smart, but not smart enough to talk like a human! Someone–something–was out there.
I logged out of my account and crept to the back door that led out to the deck. I flipped on the light switch, but the bulb must’ve burned out. I swung the screen door open and stepped out. Nothing. I almost turned to go back inside, but something made me go out into the yard. I had just reached the tireswing when a figure jumped out from behind the tree, waving wildly.
I shrieked.
“Hey, it’s just me,” the shadowy figure spoke.
“Huh?”
“PinkQT–you know from the forum.”
“PinkQT?” I repeated. “What on earth–how did you find me? What are you doing here?”
“Whoa, one question at a time.” PinkQT leaned against the tree. “You thought we were just joking, didn’t you?”
“Joking?” I must’ve looked stupid with my mouth open.
“Yeah.”
Two more figures stepped out.
I gasped. “Who are they??”
“Elisabeth and Linz,” PinkQT answered with a grin.
“Uhh…” I swayed. “This is not happening.”
“It’s happening,” laughed Linz. “We said we’d come, didn’t we?”
I stammered “But–I didn’t think–”
“It was easy,” Elisabeth said, brushing her arms off. “I knew right where to come.”
“Uh-huh,” said Linz. “That’s why we ended up in that backyard over on W. 2nd Street.”
Elisabeth glared.
“Come on,” PinkQT said, “we’ve got more places to go.”
“Go?”
“I wish you’d stop repeating everything we say,” Elisabeth rolled her eyes.
“Sorry.”
“Yup,” PinkQT replied. “We’re going to find as many members as we can–unless Elisabeth fails us.”
Elisabeth snorted and linked arms with Linz and me. “Trust is the key.”
“Right. I trusted you right into a puppy pile–”
“Who next?” Linz asked as we walked off into the darkness.
Linz
“I say we go to Texas to find Song and HAHA!” *BurntIre* said.
“Ha,” pinkQT said dryly. “The only reason you want to go to Texas is to find Dov. I told you I wasn’t interested in that.”
“Not so,” replied *BurntIre*, a little too quickly. “I’m not talking about HIM anymore, remember? Besides, there are a lot of members in Texas. Have you looked at the memberlist lately? Lily Among Thorns, Mars Hill… lots of people.”
“While we’re here, I say we should go visit Danillo88 and Samuel,” Elisabeth said. “We could see the cute little boy in real life, and stop and pick up some cute things for him along the way. I love shopping for babies.”
“Well…?” asked pinkQT.
“Perfect,” I said. “Let’s go. Do you know how to get there, Breathless Lizard?”
“Of course I do,” she said, a bit indignantly. “Trust me, remember?”
“Right. Trust you not to lead us astray,” I said. Then, I turned and winked at the others, patting my pocket where the map I had bought at the convenience store was just barely visible.
“So, which way?” asked *BurntIre*
“North for awhile, and then westish a little,” replied Elisabeth confidently. “I’ll let you know as we go. My sense of direction is super, guys. Don’t worry, I’ll get us there.”
And so it was that the four of us set out in a North-westish direction. (We hoped, anyway.)
*BurntIre*
“I haven’t seen one cactus,” I muttered. “We’re probably still in Kansas!”
“Ohhh,” PinkQT began to sing, “we’re off to see the Wizard! The wonderful Wizard of Oz!”
“OK, Lis,” Linz sighed, “tell us where we are.”
Elisabeth squinted up at the sky. “Right where we should be!”
“Any closer to Wan–I mean, Song and HAHA?” I said.
“We’re getting there. You can’t expect to walk across half the US in just a few hours can you?” Elisabeth huffed.
PinkQT pointed to a house with a light in the second story. “Let’s try up there.”
“They live in an apartment,” Linz pointed out.
I exclaimed, “Maybe it’s Wan–Hill.”
“Wan Hill?” PinkQT giggled.
“She must get tired of being called Mars Hill,” I retorted. “So… Wan Hill.”
“Alright,” Elisabeth said gaily, “Let’s go see Wan Hill!”
We scrambled over the fence and crawled through the backyard.
“Do they have a dog?” PinkQT hissed.
“I don’t know,” Linz answered. “Why?”
“I keep thinking of W. 2nd Street.”
“Shh!” Elisabeth hushed. “They might hear us!”
I rose to my knees. “How on earth are we getting there?”
“Maybe we could climb on the garage roof,” suggested PinkQT. She tiptoed to the garage, climbed on a garbage can, and on to the roof. “Simple!”
“I’m afraid of height,” I muttered, but managed to scoot myself up.
We edged ourselves closer to the window with the light on inside.
“Can you see anything?” Elisabeth whispered.
PinkQT shook her head. “I have to get closer.”
I peered over her shoulder. “It’s a female.”
PinkQT rolled her eyes at me. “Well Wannabe sure wouldn’t be wearing his hair in a ponytail! I don’t think…” She shot Elisabeth a look.
Elisabeth smiled and shook her head.
Suddenly the ponytailed female turned around. Her jaw dropped.
“It’s OK, it’s OK!” PinkQT said quickly. “It’s just PinkQT from SetApartLife. And BurntIre, Linz, and Elisabeth.”
I sighed, “You’re probably not Wan–Mars Hill.”
“No, I’m His Polished Arrow.”
Linz laughed. “Nice to meet you, Tex!”
Elisabeth shook her head. “I don’t know what happened… hey, want to join us? We’re headed for Texas.”
“Sure.” HPA stepped out her window. “I’ve always wanted to see Texas.”
“The people too,” PinkQT grinned at me.
We slid off the roof and allowed the darkness to hide us from sight.
“I know where I’m going,” Elisabeth said for the tenth time.
“Sure,” PinkQT muttered.
Linz turned her back and quietly unfolded her map.
“Can you tell where we are?” HPA whispered.
“No,” Linz whispered back. “I guess we’ll have to just keep on following her.”
“Down this street,” Elisabeth called. “See all those apartments?”
“What in the world?” I said. “Guys look over here…”
They followed me over to the other side of the street where a figure lay sprawled across a bench.
HPA leaned down. “He looks familiar.”
“BOO!”
HPA jumped back and screeched.
“Ha, got you going there!” The young man slapped his knee and rocked back and forth with laughter. He suddenly became serious. “You don’t happen to have a Mt. Dew, do you?”
Linz rolled her eyes. “SuedeKnight.”
Linz
“SuedeKnight!” HPA said. “Elisabeth! SuedeKnight lives in Wisconsin. Wisconsin! We are in WISCONSIN!”
“So?” Elisabeth said, unconcerned. “They have great cheese here!”
“So… Wisconsin is practically in the total opposite place as Texas!” *BurntIre* wailed. “We’ll NEVER get to Wan – um, Song and HAHA’s!”
“HAHA!” SuedeKnight added. “You forgot the HAHA!”
“Obviously, Elisabeth, you flunked geography.” HPA remarked dryly.
“No, guys, listen. I know what I’m doing. Really. All we have to do is walk back along this street, and then when we get to that big highway, we’ll follow it.”
I checked my map. This actually seemed like a good plan. We couldn’t get too lost if we were following a major highway, right?
“Sounds like a plan,” SuedeKnight said. “Let’s go.”
We trudged along in silence for awhile, and then HPA voiced the same thought I was having. “I’m starving.”
“Me too,” said pinkQT
“You should have brought Donut Dude with you,” *BurntIre* pointed out. “I could use a powdered donut right now.”
“I could use a Mountain Dew,” SuedeKnight said. “In fact, I think I could use an AMP.”
“It’s cool, guys. There’s a gas station right up the road,” Elisabeth said. “I remember seeing it on our way in.”
*BurntIre*
The dimly lit gas station sat alone on the side of the road. A lone pickup truck was parked by the door.
“Spooky,” HPA shivered.
“Yeah,” I said. “You know, I could go another hour or so without eating–”
“Well, I can’t go another hour or so without a Mt. Dew!” protested Suede.
“OK, then.” Elisabeth pushed him forward. “You go first.”
“Me? Why me?”
“Because you’re a guy. Our warrior poet, you know?”
Suede muttered something under his breath, but obediently opened the door.
A bell jingled.
The man behind the counter looked up. He resembled the giant from Jack and the Beanstalk. Huge arms. Full beard. Glittery eyes.
“Sir,” Suede squeaked. “Do you sell pop?”
“What kind of a place do you think this is, eh? I mean what would a gas station be without pop, eh?”
“Eh?” I repeated with a frown. “We must be closer to the border than I thought.”
Linz was already examining her map, turning it this way and that.
“In the back,” the man continued.
The rest of us went down various aisles.
“Powdered donuts over here!” PinkQT called.
“Thanks,” I said.
“Ah, you got any other money?” the man was asking Suede. “We don’t take American.”
“You don’t take American?” Suede sputtered, can in hand. “The last time I checked Wisconsin was still a state.”
“Wisconsin, eh?” The man made a noise that sounded like a chuckle. “This is Canada.”
I froze.
PinkQT gasped.
Linz whipped out her map.
Elisabeth’s mouth opened and closed.
HPA slumped against the candy rack.
“Canada!” I wailed. “Now we’ll never get to Wannabe!”
“Or Wan Hill,” PinkQT added. She gave Elisabeth a dark look.
“We… must’ve made a wrong turn,” Elisabeth said weakly.
Suede mused, “I don’t even have my passport on me.”
“Thank you, mister,” Linz sighed. “I guess that Mt. Dew will have to wait another hour.”
The bell above the door jingled.
“Hi, Pat!” a girl’s voice called. “I just put ten liters in.” She paused. “Hi, there.”
HPA looked the girl up and down. “Kris?”
The girl’s left eyebrow lifted. “How did you know my name?”
HPA’s face lit up. “Hey, guys, it’s Kris! I’m His Polished Arrow–you know, from the forum? It’s a good thing you posted that picture of yourself.”
“Wow,” said Kris, “I never expected to meet any of you here!”
“Neither did we,” PinkQT muttered.
“You’ll have to give me your names–”
“Linz.”
“Elisabeth.”
“BurntIre”
“SuedeKnight, HAHA!”
Kris gave him a puzzled look.
“PinkQT. We were headed for Texas, but SOMEHOW we ended up in Wisconsin, and then here.”
“Texas, huh?”
“Yeah,” I nodded. “Want to tag along?”
“That might be fun… sure!”
Arms linked–Suede walked behind us–we headed back down the highway.
His Polished Arrow
“Come on, Burnt Ire! We’ll never make it to Texas if you keep trudging behind!” Pink QT admonished.
“Sorry, guys; my feet are killing me! I shouldn’t have worn these flip flops.” Burnt Ire stopped and looked down at her worn flip flops in disgust.
“Well, I think I saw a billboard for a shopping mall back there. Maybe they’ll have a shoe store,” I suggested.
“Yeah, and maybe they’ll have Mountain Dew!!!” Suede Knight’s voice rose excitedly.
We walked on in the direction indicated by a brightly lit sign that promised an “exhilarating shopping experience”. As we finally approached the shopping mall, Linz pointed out a mall directory near the entrance. Everyone examined the directory until we found what we were looking for.
“Hey, look! They have a Payless!” Elisabeth exclaimed.
“And a food court; don’t forget the food court!” Suede added.
“Good, let’s go! I think I’ve put too many miles on these shoes,” Burnt Ire said with a grin.
Kris, Linz and Suede headed for the food court while the rest of us went into the Payless shoe store. After browsing through the store for about 20 minutes, Kris, Linz and Suede came to join us. I noticed they were empty handed.
“What happened to getting a Mountain Dew?” I asked.
“We couldn’t find any in the whole place!” Suede was flabbergasted.
“Yeah, I guess they just don’t believe in serving a drink with that much caffeine here.” Kris laughed.
“I think these shoes will work…” Burnt Ire held out a pair for us to examine.
“Oh, are you sure you don’t want to try these on?” Elisabeth came over carrying at least five more shoe boxes piled precariously in her arms.
“I think I only need one pair of shoes,” Burnt Ire giggled.
“Uhh, be careful, there, Elisabeth…those boxes don’t look like they’re going to stay stacked like that!” Linz warned. But alas, her warning came too late. Elisabeth stumbled into the next aisle right into a short girl with thick brown hair and beautiful gray blue eyes. Shoes flew in every direction.
“Ack! I’m sorry!” Elisabeth apologized to the girl who was rubbing her elbow from the collision.
“That’s okay…it was just an accident,” the girl replied. “Are you okay?”
All of us came rushing around the corner to see if we could be of assistance.
“That’s what you get for trying to carry so many shoes at once!” Pink QT scolded.
“Hey, let’s get these shoes cleaned out of the aisle. Burnt Ire already has a pair picked out…I’m ready to hit the road. I need some caffeine like now!” Suede Knight started directing the shoe clean up.
“Burnt Ire?” The short girl with blue eyes questioned, raising one eyebrow.
“Well that’s not really my name,” Burnt Ire replied. “That’s just what my friends here called me. It’s my screen name on this really cool forum called…”
“SetApartLife!” The girl finished.
“Hey, how’d you know?” I asked.
“I’m on that forum, too!” the girl exclaimed. “I’m HisReverentArcaneDaughter…and who are all of you?”
Kris quickly introduced everyone and explained, “We’re on our way to Texas to find some of the other forum members. Care to come along?”
“Okay! That sounds exciting! But we’d better get these shoes cleaned up first,” HRAD answered.
“Woohoo! Let us be going from this place then.” I said.
It took just a minute or two to clean up the shoe mess with all hands helping. Soon we had purchased a pair of shoes for Burnt Ire and we were on our way back to the highway.
*BurntIre*
“Are we even headed in the right direction?” HRAD asked.
“Of course!” Elisabeth declared. “You just have to trust me on this.”
Suede snorted. “And they say MEN are direction-challenged.”
“Let’s check out that house over there,” Kris suggested. “The one with a light on in the kitchen.”
“Maybe they’ll have Mt. Dew,” Suede said hopefully.
PinkQT whispered to Linz, “Men DO only have one thing on their minds.”
“Hold it.” I held up a hand. “Who’s going to open their door to a bunch of trampish-looking folks like us?”
“She has a point,” HPA said after a moment of silence. “I sure wouldn’t. Maybe only one of us should knock. How about HRAD? She doesn’t look like she crawled through somebody’s backyard.”
PinkQT grunted.
“I’ll go too,” I said. “It might not be a sweet dear lady behind that door.”
“OK,” HRAD nodded.
“Don’t forget to ask for a Mt. Dew!” Suede hissed.
I generously let HRAD knock.
The back door opened, revealing a pretty young woman.
“Yes? Can I help you?”
“Do you have a Mt. Dew?”
The sound of Suede’s voice made me jerk. “You were supposed to wait–”
“Stay right where you are.”
HRAD sucked in her breath.
The girl was holding a pan over her head, ready to chuck it at the first person who moved.
Elisabeth came up behind us. “It’s OK,” she said. “We’re not robbers or anything…”
The pan moved threateningly.
“Good move, Suede,” PinkQT said.
“Suede?” The pan lowered. “As in SuedeKnight?”
I glanced up at him. “My, but you do get around.”
“Are you all from the forum?”
Linz stepped up. “Yes, we are. I’m Linz.”
“PurpleKryptonyte. Sorry about–” She giggled and placed the pan on the counter. “I didn’t quite know what to expect.”
Kris laughed. “Suede does look a little… questionable. I’m Kris–a fellow Canadian.”
“What are you all doing here? And at this time of night?”
“We’re trying to get to Texas,” HPA explained. “You wouldn’t believe how many members we keep running into. Do you want to come along?”
“Hey, it sounds exciting! OK.”
“Do you have a Mt. Dew?” Suede tried.
“Nope, sorry,” PurpleKryptonite shook her head. “Would Coke work?”
“Coke!” Suede gagged. “Let’s get going before I pass out from lack of Mt. Dew…”
“Who was the bright one who suggested cutting through these bushes?” I mumbled, untangling my hair. “Not to complain, but my pants are getting filthy.”
“Not much farther!” Elisabeth called. “We should reach the main road in just a few minutes.”
I waited for Linz to crawl up next to me. “What’s your map say?”
Linz pulled the now-tattered paper from her back pocket. “Well, I don’t think we’re in Canada anymore. But I’m quite sure of our present location… we made so many turns back there. One thing’s for certain–we won’t be reaching Dov anytime soon. So you can stop fixing your hair.”
“Humph!” I snorted. “I’m not the least bit interested in him!”
PinkQT and Linz exchanged glances.
“I’m not!”
“Hustle, people!” said Elisabeth. “We’re almost there!”
A Ruby For Him
“Almost where?” snorted BurntIre
Elizabeth turned and glared at her, “Hey if I say we are almost there we are almost there…to Texas… you know, where Teddy Gramps lives.”
Linz and Suede roll their eyes at each other behind Elizabeth’s back.
“Forward, march!” rings out Pink QT’s voice from the back of the ranks.
Still grumbling at each other Elizabeth and BurntIre continue tromping through the bushes.
“Whew! Here is the road again.” called Elizabeth a few minutes later.
“See anywhere to get a Mt. Dew?” hollered Suede, “because I am having serious withdraw here!”
“I see a lights shining across the field over here,” replied Elizabeth, “Let’s see if it’s a town.”
“Not more detours!” groaned BurntIre.
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